Andy Lee
As another candidate walks into my office, one of the first things I like to do is ask them to go through their CV for me and help ‘bring it to life’. I like to understand their motivations and how they navigated the crossroads of life that’s led to their current position and situation – applying for a job with my company. Through this process I have heard many stories of how people find themselves in a place that they never intended to get to. Though I don’t always get to express it, I find it really interesting to hear people’s stories. Almost always the next phase of their life only ever unfolds one step at a time. The beginning of the next phase cannot start and doesn’t reveal itself until the end of the current phase. And generally we don’t know when that will be.
My own CV would fall into that category – not counting family takeaways and Chinese restaurants I have helped out in, I have had jobs in Utilities, Financial Services, Data Protection, Sales, Recruitment and E-Commerce. All of them very different roles, from data entry to people management, sales to business improvement, operations to coaching. So were all these roles simply a means to an end? To my end goal – which I am still trying to figure out? What am I supposed to be doing with my life? Where is this journey taking me?
The first time I remember really having to think about what I wanted to do and where I wanted to end up was having to pick my A-Level subjects. Then it was my degree. To be honest, I didn’t have a clue what I wanted to do. I ended up picking an engineering subject that I felt would leave me the most open doors following graduation. To date, I haven’t applied any of the content from my degree in any of my jobs. Would that then be considered a waste?
Over time, I’ve changed my focus from ‘what should I do with my life?’ to appreciating and fully experiencing the moments that I found myself in. The tragedy of constantly trying to figure out the purpose of your life is that you don’t make peace with where you are currently, and before long there isn’t much life or time left for you to pursue that thing even if you end up figuring out what it is.
How you go through what you’re going through shapes you more than the attainment of the goal you’re longing for. A couple of weeks ago I went walking with a good friend of mine in the Lake District to celebrate his soon-to-be-born baby that was almost due. Otherwise known as a man shower (male version of a baby shower for mums-to-be).
Through rain, heavy winds and steep climbs, we made it to the peak, and were rewarded with the rays of the sun breaking through the clouds, revealing beautiful views of the landscape around us. It wouldn’t have been the same if we were able to simply drive to the top, get out of the car and just be there. The hard work of the climb made it all that more rewarding. It was a mental battle to keep going, my legs were starting to tire, I was starting to get hot and sweaty but I savoured the experience.
BE where you are, even if it isn’t where you want to be. It is in the learning, the doing, the experiencing, the overcoming, the practicing, the being there that ensures you are fully living in the moment, even if things are tough. This is part of the human experience. Don’t short cut it. Embrace it.
There is beauty in the perseverance, the overcoming and resilience of life. There is beauty in your current circumstance, be it the journey of pregnancy or parenthood, job seeking, or looking for employment, or seeking that special someone. Behind every achievement, every milestone, every goal, is the potential for a beautiful story. Your story. Learn to live out your story fully so that you can inspire and encourage others with it.
旅途之美
文/Andy Lee
翻譯/啟思
當面試者走進我辦公室的時候,我最先要做的幾件事之一就是讓他們和我一起瀏覽一遍自己的簡歷,並向我更生動形象地介紹他們自己。我想要了解他們的動機,他們是怎樣在人生的十字路口為自己導航而達成現在的位置和狀況——申請到我們公司來工作。在這一過程中,我聽到很多人講過他們是怎樣發現自己置身於一個並不想去的地方。盡管我並不總是這麽說,但傾聽別人的故事真的很有意思。他們人生的下一階段幾乎總是每次只展開一步。直到現階段結束,下一階段才揭開面紗,開始進行。而且通常我們不會知道那一時刻將何時來臨。
我自己的簡歷也屬於這一類——不算家庭外賣和我曾幫忙過的中餐館,我曾經在公共事業、金融服務、數據保護、銷售、招聘和電子商務領域工作過。所有這些工作都是完全不同的角色,從數據輸入到人員管理,從銷售到業務改進,從運行操作到輔導培訓。難道所有這些角色僅僅是達到目標的一種方式嗎?是為了達到我的最終目標嗎——我仍在努力找出它是什麽。我應該過怎樣的人生?這段旅程將帶我前行至何方?
我記得人生中第一次要思考決定我想做什麽以及我要去哪裏是關於選擇我的A-Level課程。然後是我的學位。實話說,當時我並不清楚自己想要做什麽。最終我選了工科課程,因為我覺得這會在畢業後為我帶來更多機會。但時至今日我也沒有從事過和我學位相關的任何工作。這會是一種浪費嗎?
慢慢的,我改變了我的關注。從「我應該過怎樣的人生」到欣賞並充分享受我身處的每一時刻。不斷去尋找人生目標的悲劇就在於你永遠不會與當下和解,而生命並沒有留給你很多時間去尋找那樣的東西,即便你最後找出了它是什麽。
你選擇經歷你所應當經歷之事的方式比達成你一直追求的目標更能塑造你的人生。幾週前我和一位好友去湖區散步來慶祝他的孩子即將出生,或者說這是個準爸爸派對(準媽媽派對— Baby shower 的男人版)。冷風陣陣,陰雨霏霏,山坡很陡峭,但最終我們成功登頂,而得到的回報就是看到太陽穿破雲層的光芒,照耀著我們四週的美景。如果我們僅僅是驅車登頂,這將是完全不一樣的體驗。艱苦的攀登讓一切都無比值當。堅持下去是一場精神戰鬥,我的腿變得疲憊,我開始發熱流汗,但我盡情享受這段經歷。
好好活在當下—儘管你還不滿足於目前。在學習、做事、經歷、克服困難、不斷練習之中,就算很困難,但也能讓你全身心地活在當下每一瞬間。這是人生閱歷的一部分。別抄近道,盡情享受。
堅持不懈,克服困難、感受生命的韌性,在這之中有大美。美在於你當前的狀態中,不論是懷孕期、為人父母、找工作、就職和尋找人生真愛之中……在每一項成就、每一座里程碑和每一個目標之後都有一個美麗的故事。你的故事。盡情活出你的故事,你也能用它來激勵鼓舞他人。